Title:		Drug Proofing the Family
		Authors:		Erica Wittenberg & Jim Parker
		Publication Date:		September 2003
		Catalog No:		204

..If Your Child Needs Help

No matter how hard you try and how conscientiously you follow the guidelines we (and others) lay out, at some point you may decide that your child or family should see a counselor, or even that your child needs to be in a treatment program.

If you're at this point now, don't take it as a sign of failure. The cultural influences we're all up against are vast: Kids are subjected to a wall of cultural "noise" today that goes far beyond anything we were exposed to at their age.

From advertising and music videos to movies and TV, kids today are awash in an ocean of manipulative imagery and conspicuous consumerism, indoctrinated from the moment they can sit upright in front of a television by an ethic of quick-fix materialism and instant gratification, where long-shared cultural values (including personal responsibility, hard work, and diligence) are often seen as the province of squares and losers.

Getting outside help is a powerful statement that you see your child's problem as a serious matter. You can help by not presenting treatment as a punishment or a burden that the child has inflicted on the family. If it's your choice to seek treatment, it's your responsibility to follow through on it.

Before you do anything, come to a joint decision regarding the need for treatment with your spouse or partner. Decide whether or not to give your child any choice in the matter -- and what consequences will follow if he or she refuses -- before discussing it with the child. If both parents don't agree -- or your child refuses -- consider getting involved with a parent support group or consulting a family counselor, yourself.

Options & Resources

There is almost always more than one way to respond to difficult family problems. And few family problems are more troubling to parents than the use of drugs or alcohol by their children.

Remember: You do have choices. You can act in a way that fits both your personal style and your intuitive sense of what's right and wrong. Although some responses might seem more likely to work than others, it's up to you to test the options and choose what works best for you and your family.

Remember that no single family can solve a problem that exists virtually everywhere. If you need outside help, get it.

Check out available resources in your community. Use the support, counseling, and other services available from professional programs and self-help groups. And make use of other parents in your neighborhood who share your concerns. If you do, everyone involved will benefit, including your kids.

In the next chapter, we'll provide some basic current information on commonly-abused drugs and alcohol. If you're interested in obtaining more detailed information about specific drugs, or you're curious about some of the approaches to parenting we've suggested, check out our web site at www.doitnow.org. After that, it's up to you.

Continue with Chapter 6: Drugs Today
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